I've Fallen and I Can't Get Up

The Leopard was waiting on line at the post office on his lunch hour the other day when a middle aged woman a few feet away suddenly fell to the floor with a sharp thump and began shaking uncontrollably, clutched in seizure.

It was interesting to see how the 100 or so folks in the crowded office reacted to the spectacle. Some nonchalantly walked by and paid her little or no mind. Some immediately ran over to comfort her. An elderly man shouted, "Put a pencil in her mouth so she won't bite her tongue off!", but didn't relinquish his position on line. There was no doctor in the house, so several people made calls from their cell phones, staying put in case they were called to the counter. After a few minutes, there was a tangible awkwardness in the air. One woman who had came over and was now resting the woman's head in her lap kept whispering, "It will be all right, dear, It will be all right." After all the calls had been made, and the authorities had been notified, there was nothing to do but wait. The only comment made by the few people still interested was, "Wonder when they'll get here"? Most people seemed simply bored, as if they wished they could turn the channel to another show.

After about 15 minutes, as the Leopard stepped into the street and noticed that the ambulance had finally arrived, I felt relieved. Part of my belief in the milk of human kindness was restored.

Oscars, Shmoskers: The Leopard list

The Leopard hates artistic competitions. Once all involved are of a certain level of achievement, it's all relative. Still such industry pageants as the Grammys and the Oscars see fit to pit one aesthetic against another. Who's to say one artist in one genre is better than one in another if they're both brilliant in their work? And God, it's so damn embarassing to watch everyone try to act humble as they accept their little golden action figures.

The only true competition is with Oscar Night attire. There, the
search for greatness is more predicated on the delicate balance between elegance and glamour. And it's great fun to see who falls off the high wire.

Still, being a huge film fan, I saw many of the movies nominated at this years Oscars, so here's The Leopard list of film and performances. Not necessarily the best, but the Leopard's favorites:

1. Vicky Cristina Barcelona

One of Woody Allen's best in years. Penelope Cruz is amazing.

2. Doubt

Just a lot of fun. Not quite as serious as it would like to be. Meryl Streep seriously dines on the Brooklyn scenery.

3. Redbelt

Okay, it doesn't make much sense by the end, but Chiwetel Ejiofor makes it all work anyway. A thinking man's martial arts film.

4. Let The Right One In

A low budget Swedish vampire film with an unknown cast that kicks the ass of most of Hollywood's output.

5. The Wrestler

Mickey Rourke just does things no one else has ever done onscreen. Nuff' said.

6. Frost/Nixon

Good n' smart. A lot of has been said of Frank Langella's performance, but Michael Sheen is marvelous.

7. Slumdog Millionaire

Yeah, it's a bit overrated by now. But it's still super entertaining.

8. Dark Knight

The Leopard has written abou this film before, so let's not be redundant. Let's just say it's one of the 1 or 2 best superhero movies ever made, and leave it at that.

These are the movies I just had the most fun with. If you haven't seen any of these, check 'em out!

Janeane's Dilemmas

The Leopard recently had the good fortune to visit The Upright Citizens Brigade Theater in Manhattan to attend a one-on-one interview with the comedian/actor/commentator Janeane Garofalo. In a wonderfully enlightening and entertaining conversation, Garofalo discussed her career with a sly wit.

Probably most attractive about Garofalo's persona is her candidness. she mentioned how at the ripe old age of 44, what an extraordinarily tough time she's had finding roles, which is a result of the sexism and ageism of Hollywood. She also spoke about how even at her peak, many of her past movies regrettably came out just plain bad. She even called probably her most well known film, The Truth about Cats and Dogs, "Sentimental crap", and her most recent show, Fox's 24 "Preposterous". She spoke without fear about Ben Stiller, whom she's worked with many times, saying that she was once fired by him, and the only way she could get along with the star creatively was to simply "Do what he wanted".

This was refreshing, especially considering all the BS that movie stars spout about how wonderful they all are, afraid that they may blow a chance at a gig if they don't keep their mouths shut. Hey, the Christian Bale incident is probably more the norm than the exception. It's just that usually no one's dumb enough to blow their stacks while the audio is still running.

Garofalo just seemed to be a genuinely nice person. In a quick Q&A with the audience at the ended the interview, someone shouted out that they'd like help getting some lame show idea produced. Instead of blowing the person off, she invited them backstage and offered them her managers' number. Now that's class.

Buy My T-shirt & Save The World While You're At It.

In two days, We will have a new president. In the past, this type of revelation has not meant much to The Leopard. Yes, I have always done my civic duty and voted. But in the end, Democrat or Republican, the final outcome seemed to affect me very little. I have thought of the Presidency as the very epitome of bureaucracy. Something that I contribute to in a small way but don't expect to benefit from.

In this past election, for the first time, I felt like my vote mattered; and that for the first time who is in the White House matters; and that person might just in some significant way make a difference in my day-to- day life.

I have never in my wildest dreams ever thought in my lifetime that a person of color would make that hallowed ground of white superiority their home; I have never felt so proud of this country than when I realized that despite all the racism and outrageous injustices I have witnessed in this life, the good people of the USA bonded together for the greater good.

Which brings me to my T-shirt (lousy segue way, I know) I wanted to contribute something fun in some small way. I designed a T-shirt. Wanna end all the world's problems? Let's all wear cool Obama T-shirts.

To order a shirt, Get yours here.

Happy Holidays!

The Leopard hasn't updated this blog in months, but I wanted to punch in and let anyone who still subscribes to this blog know (if there is anyone left) that I'm still alive & kicking and will add entries in the near future.

In the meantime, have a mighty, mighty Obama new year, & see you at the inauguration !!

My Man Herbie Part 2

A couple of months ago, The Leopard wrote about how much I admire the brilliant jazz musician Herbie Hancock. Recently, I actually got the opportunity catch him at the famous Apollo theater. He was a guest on an upcoming episode of a new TV series taped in Harlem for the Sundance channel called "Spectacle: Elvis Costello with.."

It was kind of a strange evening.  As I waited outside on the ticket line, people seemed giddy with excitement about the show.  I chatted with several folks who were fans of either Herbie or Elvis and anticipating a great night.  But we were all a little unsure about what to expect.

The Apollo theater itself is much smaller than it looks on TV.  I was a several seats from the stage and I still felt like I could see Elvis' nose hairs a little too clearly.  He came out looking a little haggard and worse for wear in a rumpled fedora and his omnipresent horn rims.  He explained the simple concept of the show:  a program where he would interview his favorite musicians and discuss their careers. In the process, they would perform a song or two. Earlier in the week, he had completed a show with Sir Elton John.

Herbie came out with the superb bass player Christian McBride and a young drummer in tow. He was looking great, nowhere near his 69 years. 

Costello proceeded to interview him about his long career, reading his questions from an overhead teleprompter. Elvis' interview style was, in a word, unorthodox.  He tended to meander with his own ruminations and was rather longwinded. In fact, he spoke much more than Herbie ever did. Some of their conversation drifted into pure musician-speak, shoptalk which tended to alienate and bore the general audience.

Herbie only performed three full tunes during the nearly three hour taping. First, an ambiguous kind of solo piano noodling, meant to show his classical influences, then, a fun little musical interlude where he played his hit tune "Watermelon Man" first acoustically with his band, and then switching to synths, doing the Headhunters version. 

The last performance featured Elvis himself singing on a tune, Mike Douglas style, from the Grammy winning album River: The Joni Letters,  called "Edith and the Kingpin."  Accompanied by Herbie, he sang in that limited, reedy voice of his with little emotion or resonance.

By this time, almost half the audience had left, annoyed with the lack of actual music. Personally, I had a great time listening to Herbie tell (when he was allowed to) anecdotes & stories and discuss specific albums, songs and performances from his amazing career. He came off jovial and happy, and didn't seem to give a fig that some the audience wasn't as interested as his host, who, to his credit, seemed to be genuinely in awe of him.

  

Verrazano Bridge Blues

As the Leopard was riding the Staten Island Ferry to Manhattan a couple of weekends ago, I began to reminisce growing up in the NYC area as a youth.   One of my earliest memories is of my dad occasionally gathering my family when the mood struck him, and as a "treat", we'd pile in our wood-lined station wagon and we'd drive across the Verrazano-Narrows Bridge around dawn Friday or Saturday Summer evenings.  He'd look up at the lights and say emotively, "Look--Beautiful"!

As tacky as it sounds, I enjoyed this, because my Dad was seldom around during the week, working two jobs and taking classes. I think it was a a not-so-subtle attempt to bond with my sister, brother and me in some way.